“What shall
we do with a drunken sailor?” Still an Oldie but a Goodie! For the Good ol’
Canoe Club, it was business-as-usual to look the other way. Now, the days of the
drunken debauchery and a girl in every port are here no more … a thing of the
past.
Since the
dawn of the Alcohol Deglamorization Program and a Wally Cleaver picture perfect
Boy Scout in every uniform, being the ‘Drunken Sailor’ has fallen out of
parlance. The work hard so we can play hard mentality has gone to the wayside
for a more politically correct version of a Squidly Diddly Squared Away
Shipmate.
Jimmy Buffet
put it best … “I’m a Pirate Two-Hundred Years Too Late!” The marvels of crackerjack
shore leave most regarded by shitfaced,
brawling and womanizing sailors chasing barmaids and shore whores dates back to
the days of iron men and wooden ships, even after the good ol’ U.S. Navy banned
alcohol on ships!
Back in
those days, the U.S. Navy functioned on the British rum ration system, which
stipulated that all sailors would receive a frankly enormous quantity of hard
liquor per day, served from an ornate oak tub emblazoned with the words “The
Queen, God Bless Her.”
Since the
turn of the Century U.S. ban of drinking aboard ships, excessive drunkenness on
shore leave was still unconstrained as reparation to keep new recruits coming
after all the hard work underway came to an end. I suppose the ol’ Canoe Club figured
that monitoring behavior on shore during liberty resulted in fewer recruits
signing the dotted line. In liberty ports the world over, crackerjacks lit up
the town like the ‘Fourth of July!’ When they left the ship it was a sailors’
right to do his best to drink the town dry in flotsam and monger the women
accordingly.
Liberty is as
short as a day in those foreign exotic ports, so it’s best to make it as perfect
and memorable as one could make it … hence the making of great “No-Shitter Sea
Stories!” It was typical to do what we pleased in every tavern, bar, lounge,
soi, and nightclub with swagger and fervor. “Like a caged animal let out into
the wild, we spent money like drunken sailors, and as drunken sailors … mostly
on liquor and whores, maybe some gambling and all because we were just that …
Drunken Sailors!!!
Favorite
ports like Subic, Pattaya, Puerto Rico, Rhota Spain, Naples Italy and Greece
made an industry of satisfying the consumption of decadent sea fairs and their
indulgence of excess and desires. But it wasn’t always fun and games as we
found in places like France and Japan where some of the locals had no appreciation
of our senses for debauchery! Crackerjack Sailors were often found in the
confines of the local Constable cited for anything from soliciting prostitutes
to starting beer brawls and pissing in alley ways. Ours is renown the world over as our rag hat
collective sometimes got us in a bit of trouble in our fever pitched alcohol
induced enthusiasm.
The aggressiveness
of sailors has persisted over the years in spite of more than a few incidents
from across the pond worldwide. In Japan a twelve-year-old schoolgirl was raped
and Japanese locals began to riot calling for the removal of our bases
altogether. The same happened in other ports like the Philippines, Spain and France
as demonstrations often intensified. In the day and age of Political Correctness
and the lack of a good old Cold War Enemy, it became increasingly clear the Navy
was concerned with the threat to international relations.
Suddenly there
was an irreversible shift in the Navy’s thinking. The Ol’ Canoe Club suddenly
changed its drunken and iniquitous ways. It became a professional consortium of
Choir Boys and Prudent Young Ladies with iron clad chastity! The Big Brass was
no longer willing to turn a blind eye to the unruliness, and worse for wear
days of old. “The Alcohol Deglamorization Program” came into effect impacting
all Naval Personnel while expecting more responsible behavior in its alliance
with other worldly nations. The stakes
had been readjusted, and the boys in brass were not kidding around. With that,
the shore leave culture of a drunken sailor with a girl in every port was
poised to go down the hatch of history.
But the vestiges
of that history and culture are forever written in our annals as a
testament to the work hard play hard sailors of the past. The term “binge
drinking” comes from the task of binging on a naval ship, or rinsing the empty
liquor cask with water. Cargo was loaded onto ships through an opening on the
ship deck known as a hatch, as the liquor, too, goes “down the hatch.” And
never forget that we are the only service to reference alcohol in our fight
song as we “Drink to the Foam” on our last night ashore! So I sound off on this
little hitch with a hardy “Anchors Aweigh my boys … Anchors Aweigh!” It was fun
while it lasted!!!
