THE WINE TASTER

 

A sign was posted at the entrance to a wine merchant's warehouse building...

"EXPERIENCED WINE TASTER NEEDED"

"POSITION STARTS IMMEDIATELY"

 

A retired ole’ Navy Chief Petty Officer, drunk and with a ragged dirty look and smelling of last night's rounds, strolled by the building and saw the sign. He went into the building to apply for the position.

Aghast at his appearance, the director wondered how to send him away but, to be fair, he gave him a glass of wine to taste.

The old Chief held the glass up to his left eye, tilted his head toward incoming sunlight and studied the contents looking through the glass. He then took a sip and said, "It's a Southern California Muscat, three years old, grown on a north slope, matured in steel containers. Somewhat low-grade but acceptable."

"That's correct," said the boss. Glancing at his blonde assistant he said..."Another one, please."

The Chief took the goblet, full of a deep red liquid, stuck his nose into the glass, sniffed deeply and took a long slow sip....rolling his eyeballs in a circle, he then looked at the director and said..."It's a cabernet sauvignon, eight years old, south-western slope, oak barrels, matured at eight degrees. Requires three more years for the finest results."

"Absolutely correct. A third glass." said the director.

Receiving another glass, again, the Chief eyed the crystal, took in a little bit of the aroma and sipped very softly....''It's a pinot blanc champagne, very high grade and exclusive,'' said the drunk calmly.

The director was astonished and winked at his young assistant to suggest something.

She left the room and came back in with a wine glass half-full of urine.

The old Navy Chief eyed it suspiciously...the color he could not quite recall. He took a sniff, touched it to his tongue, held it over a candle then up to the light, then closed his eyes and said, ...

"It's a blonde, 26 years old, three months pregnant, and if I don't get the job,

............ I'll name the father."

 

NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE TALENTS OF A NAVY CHIEF PETTY OFFICER....