Limericks
& Shanties … On the High Seas could be a Sailor’s favorite past-time! I
hope you Enjoy these few ...
There
once was a sailor from Wales
An expert
at pissing in gales
He could
piss in a jar from the top-gallant spar
Without
even wetting the sails …
There
once was a Sailor from Tulass
Whose
balls were made out of brass,
when he
clanked them together
they
played stormy weather
and
sparks shot out of his arse…
There was
a Young Sailor from Kent
Whose Rod
was so long it was bent
So to
save him some trouble
He bent
it in double
And
instead of coming – he went!
There
once was a Sailor from Bel-Air
Who was
doing his wife on the stair
But the
banister broke So he doubled his stroke
And
finished her off in mid-air…
A strange
young Sailor from Leeds
Rashly
swallowed a package of seeds
Great
tufts of fine grass Sprouted out of his ass
And his
balls were covered with weeds…
There was
a young Sailor from Brighton
Who
thought he’d at last found a tight ‘un.
He said,
“Oh my love, It fits like a glove.”
Said she,
“But you’re not in the right ‘un.”
There was
a young sailor named Bates
Who
danced the fandango on skates.
But a
fall on his cutlass
Has
rendered him nutless,
And
practically useless on dates…
Does anyone know the BALLAD of Shine ?
ReplyDeleteTheir once was a window with wine.
DeleteWhom spent her days with moon shine.
One day on the toilet with nothing to foil it. She brew her on whiskey and wine
Shine, Shine, please save me,
ReplyDeleteI'll give you more pussy than you ever did see1
There once was a sailor from Boston, who drove a little red Austin.
ReplyDeleteHe had room for his ass and a gallon as gas;
But his balls hung so low he lost 'em.
There once was a sailor from Peru,
Who fell asleep in a canoe.
As he dreamed of Venus, he played with his penis,
And woke with a hand full of goo!
To her grandson inquired Grandma Todd
ReplyDeleteDo you spend your nights rubbing your rod?
Your old man as a kid
Undoubtedly did.
If you don't do it too, you are odd!
- Preacher
There once was a sailor called Screwy dick.
ReplyDeleteThe worlds only squid with a corkscrew prick
He spent his life in a futile hunt
To find a woman with a corkscrew cunt
One day he found her, but then fell dead
That fuckin bitch was a left hand thread