"Retired Sea Captain"

 

A retired Navy Captain met a former sailor who used to serve as his personal orderly while under him on the last ship the Captain had commanded. The Captain decided to hire him to do the same kind of work he did while he was in the Navy. He told him…

“Wake me up every morning at 0600.”

The next morning, at 0600 hours, the orderly strode into the retired Captain’s bedroom, shook him awake, and then leaned over and spanked the Captain’s wife on the backside …

“Alright missy, it’s back to town you go!”

 

"Navy in Art"

 Rather it is by land, air, or sea no doubt we are the greatest Navy that has ever sailed the seas. Here is a great collection of art prints I’ve collected for your enjoyment…

USS California (BB 44) 

USS Saratoga (CV3)

USS Abraham Lincoln (SSBN 602)

World War I Battle Fleet returning to New York Harbor

Task Force Hornets 1943

Score another for the Subs 1943

Battleship Flotilla 1941

Torpedo onload

F4 Phantoms

Sweepers Man Your Brooms 1944

Escort

Arleigh Burke Tomahawk Launch

F14 Tomcat

USS Leahy CG16

( Fin )

"Never Miss a Good Chance to Shut Up"

 

A meeting at the Naval Station, was attended by an Admiral who outranked everyone onboard station…

"Don't let me interfere with your work," he said. "I'll just sit here quietly." 

Soon afterward, the Admiral interrupted with a comment... 

"Sorry," he apologized. "You won't hear another word from me."

A few minutes later, the officer again felt compelled to speak and concluded,

"That's all I'm going to say."

Not long after, he took the floor once more and then contritely vowed to remain silent…

"That's okay, Sir," a Chief Petty Officer called out from the back. "You just won me five bucks"

"The Admiral"

 Here is a collection of cartoons picking fun at the Admiralty. I hope you enjoy this bit of humor…

(Admiral's Gig)

( Fin )

"Submarine Ops"

 

A LONG-TIME SUBMARINER, this Master Chief had thought he'd heard every possible description of a submerged operation until a group of teachers toured his attack submarine in San Diego.

One woman asked one of the petty officer tour guides what it's like steering a submarine underwater with only sonar for guidance…

"Well, ma'am, if you painted your car's windshield black, then drove down the freeway while listening to your bitchy wife with her head out the moon roof while some midget operates the gas and the brakes for you… it would be pretty close."

"December Pinups 2022"

 These are the type of racy photos that used to adorn lonely servicemen’s lockers, the walls of barracks, and even the sides of planes. Before today’s political correctness, pinup pictures, magazines, and calendars raised morale and reminded the young men what they were fighting for. I hope you enjoy this month’s installment of pinups…

( Fin )