" More Joyous Limericks "

 

There once was a handsome young seaman

Who with ladies was a real demon.

In peace or in war,

At sea or on shore,

He certainly dished out the semen.

 

There once was a girl from Decatur

Who went out to sea on a freighter.

She was screwed by the master…

An utter disaster …

But the crew all made up for it later.

 

 A cute little lass named O’Dare,

Sailed on a ship to Kenmare.

But the cute little honey,

Left home her money,

So she laid the whole crew for her fare.

 

 

There was a young lady at sea,

Who said ‘God how it hurts when I pee.’

‘I see’ said the mate,

That accounts for the state,

Of the Captain, the Boatswain, and me!

 

 There once was a sailor named Lee,

Who rescued a gal in the sea …

She asked how to pay,

He said just one way …

Go down for the third time on me!

 

There once was a sailor named Jed,

Who took a mermaid to bed …

He said to be blunt,

I can’t find your cunt,

So give me a blowjob instead!

 

There once was a sailor named Ted,

Who went to his skipper and said …

“Since dating your daughter …

It hurts to pass water …

I’ve bent all the pipes in the head!”

( Fin )