Wednesday, October 7, 2015

‘You know You’ve Been In The Navy Too Long When…’

You refer to the family car as the "liberty boat".

You refer to the drive-through at McDonald's as an "UNREP".

Your wife says she has PMS and you ask her if she verified her MRC.

You do not let your kids leave the ship (home) without a collared shirt.

You take hourly readings on your refrigerator and oven.

You refer to your wife as the "Berthing P. O."

Your son falls off the front porch and you call away "man overboard".

You consider closing up the house for the night as "setting condition Zebra".

You call your back porch the "Fantail".

When you change the oil in your car you hang a "Danger Tag" on the ignition.

When you're finished changing the oil in your car, you sign the "13 week file".

You call the operator for a phone check.

When your smoke detector goes off, you don an OBA.

Your children get in trouble and you give them "NJP".

You refer to the upstairs of your house as the "01 Level".

Your car's fifth gear is also known as "Ahead Flank".

Your clogged sink has a "trouble call number" assigned to it.

Your wife "tapes off" the kitchen to mop the floor.

You issue your children "liberty cards".

When you walk out the front door, you feel obligated to put on a hat.

When the mailman arrives, you muster the Bravo working party on the front steps.

You're proud of your son for raising his biology grade from a "Delta to a Bravo".

The baby sitter has to get her "qual card" signed off before she watches the kids.

You have a compulsion to sleep on the top shelf of your closet.

You walk around with your stereo headphones on and mumble all secure.

10 comments:

  1. While driving down the highway you place the car in reverse and floor it to test its ability to come to a full stop.

    ReplyDelete
  2. When you tell your teenager to "Stand down!"

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  3. You refer to your wife as drydock and your kids as Hull 1 and Hull 2.

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  4. You plan a road trip and ask AAA where the Off Limits sections are.

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  5. Stuart Johnson HM2(Ret)USNOctober 17, 2015 at 5:23 PM

    Every night you say "lights out, I'm hitting the rack, smoking lamp is out".

    ReplyDelete
  6. When you turn on red lights at 2200 and the white ones at 0600

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  7. you announce that you are going to the "rain locker" after getting home from work

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  8. you still hold "1630 sweepers" before you go out of the house at night

    ReplyDelete