Friday, July 28, 2017

'F.R.E.D.'


Here’s another ‘Goofy Memory’ that zipped right out of my analog mind and out into the open…

I know some of you shipmates went to the old school B.E.E.! This was before what’s now known as Tech Core!! We had a computer that graded our progress and his name was F.R.E.D.!! How many of you ol’ coots remember F.R.E.D.?!?

I remember when we were introduced to F.R.E.D., the central mainframe computer that would calculate your test score through each associated module! F.R.E.D. was an acronym… you remember Navy acronyms don’t you?!?  F.R.E.D. stood for “Fucking Ridiculous Electronic Device!”  Supposedly the creators of F.R.E.D. had come up with the name!!!

F.R.E.D. was nothing more than a scanning computer where you put your answer sheet full of scribbled in bubbles through it’s mouth and it would spit it out the other end and in my case… tell me what a damned idiot I was! B.E.E. was at the time, a self-paced course and the instructors were merely proctors who were there to stand over you and make sure you weren’t cheating or screwing off in the cubicles!! They weren’t much help unless you were an ass kisser or had D-cups for chesticles!!!

The Proctors were all employed by some local community college … Lake something or rather … hell, I forget the name! They all wore tan colored smocks and smoked two packs a day… and most were retired Goats from the Chief’s Mess!! I’m pretty sure if the course curriculum were on advanced female bust development they would have taken charge and schooled every one of us… I would have paid more attention and aced the course if that were the case!!!

But we were just young and dumb … Smelling like moth balls … Drinking coffee you could patch potholes with and breathing permafrost … doing nothing worth mentioning!!!




Thursday, July 27, 2017

'Alexander Francis Pesqueira'


Al Pesqueira entered the Navy at the age of 17 and served from 1943 to 1945 in the Pacific Theatre earning the rank of BMS 3 when he left the Navy in 1945! As the years went by, he would tell war stories of his time in the Navy!! The one that stands out the most in our minds was when Admiral Nimitz's ship was refueling off of Al's ship!! Al was standing on the forward deck supervising the re-fueling process when Admiral Nimitz yelled over at Al…


"Square away your hat sailor!"


... and that's what Al remembered the most about being a U.S. Navy Sailor in the days of World War II!!! 




Sunday, July 23, 2017

'Recruiting Excursions'


Returning to Jerry Paoli’s artwork, this is a collection of his pieces regarding the trials and tribulations of Navy Recruiting…

So, you've graduated high school, and now you're ready to tackle the world! And what better way to do so than with a few years in the Swashbuckling Navy!


Some recruiters like to accentuate the dangers and adventures in being a Crackerjack Warrior even emphasizing the risks and harsh conditions that swashbuckling sailors endure! Are you badass enough to take it?!? Do you want to be?!?



Other recruiters tend to depict the seafarers life as far more glamourous than real life! These recruiters tend to downplay the danger of violent death!! Of course, everyone is already aware of that part of the military… that’s the point!!!
 



The recruiter, who is completely trustworthy and would never mislead you, explained the whole thing to you!  You ship out for Basic, get some cushy job that’s out of this world and you’ll get stationed in Hawaii surrounded by Island Girls drinking Cocktails on the Beach!!!



I went to the Navy’s Enlisted Recruiting Orientation course in Pensacola, Florida in 1999! The instructor told us that statistically speaking, women make the best recruiters… especially if they’re good looking!!!


Recruiters are salesmen! And a good salesman has got to know how to close the deal!! Are you ready to join the Navy today?!?




Sometimes recruiters will go to the extreme to make that magic numbers… that means they’ll do just about anything to make goal!! It’s a numbers game!!!


 

Walk-ins are the worst! Sufficiently disturbed enough you don’t have to sell them, because they’re running from the law, have an incurable disease or they owe thousands in child support for the ten kids they’ve made with Miss Baby-Momma!!!



The ‘Buddy Program’ can be the recruiters Best Friend or Worst Enemy… but some things just simply don’t work out!!!