Friday, January 12, 2024

" Quick and Easy "

 



The Lieutenant’s Wife asked her husband …

“Every time you get underway, the Skipper gives his wife a big kiss and hug. Why don’t you do the same?”

“I’m afraid the Skipper wouldn’t like it.”

 

Seaman Sam to Seaman Jones …

“You said before you married Anne you had something to get off your chest. What is it?”

“A tattooed heart with the name Peggy on it.”

 

Petty Officer Becker to the new booters on board…

“Don’t worry so much about mess cranking. When I was a non-designated seaman, I spent so much time in the galley that I won the ‘Silver Lettuce’ award with a tomato cluster.”

 

What did the Mess Crank say to the Mess Cook?

“Boy, this soup tastes much better in the galley than it does out on the mess.”

“That’s not a soup you’re eating, that’s dishwater.”

 

Some fanciful descriptions of euphemistic overkill describing the instruments of love sailors use while on leave & liberty …

-      Dancing with the one-eyed sailor

-      Fastening the chin strap on the helmet of love

-      Unleashing the alabaster yak

-       Playing the single-string air guitar.

 

 

 

( Fin )

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