Tuesday, July 9, 2013

'How S#!t Happens'

… In the beginning was the Plan.
… And then came the Assumptions.
… And the Assumptions were without form.
… And the Plan was without Substance.
… And darkness was upon the face of the ship’s crew.
… And so the crew spoke among themselves saying…

 "It is a crock of shit, and it stinks."

… And so the crew went unto their Leading Petty Officers and said…

 "It is a crock of dung, and we cannot live with the smell."

  And so the Leading Petty Officers went unto their Chiefs and said…

 "It is a container of organic waste, and it is very strong, such that none may abide by it."

… And so the Chiefs went unto their Department Heads and said…

 "It is a vessel of fertilizer, and none may abide its strength."

… And the Department Heads spoke among themselves saying to one another…

 "It contains that which aids plant growth, and it is very strong."

… And the Department Heads went to the Executive Officer and said…

 "It promotes growth, and it is very powerful."

... And so the Executive Officer went to the Skipper and said unto him…

"It has very powerful effects."

... And the Skipper looked upon the Plan and saw that it was good!
... And the Plan became Policy!!
... And that my friends is how shit happens!!!


  1. the six Ps

    Proper Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance

  2. 7 P's
    Prior Proper Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance

  3. To add to the list:
    Failure on your part to properly plan does not necessitate an emergency on my part - Deal With It.

    Great stuff Dan,