“Some More of The Ol’ Canoe Club Sayings”

In the Navy it was always said there are a lot of acronyms. Such as the word Navy itself … “Never Again Volunteer Yourself.”   Because you know what they say … “They can make it harder but you can make it longer.”  Here are some more sayings and phrases I’d picked up over the years in this here Canoe Club. But be forewarned, don’t try this onboard in today’s environment … you might be standing tall at Skippy’s Mast explaining yourself for lack of professionalism and such. It’s just how it goes these days.

Just a Few More Acronyms …

1.     FNG – Fuck’n New Guy.

2.    FTN – Fun Time Navy or Fuck The Navy

3.    FFG – Forever Fucking Gone

4.    BDNWW – Broke Dick No Worky Worky

5.    BOHICA – Bend Over Here It Comes Again

6.    CIWS – Christ It Won’t Shoot

7.    FIIGMO – Fuck It I Got My Orders

8.    FUBAR – Fucked Up Beyond All Recognition

9.    BOCOD – Beat Off Cut Off Date – demarcation before pulling into homeport

10.  HMFIC – Head Mother Fucker In Charge

Common sayings by the Chief or an Salty LPO …

1.     Sometimes it’s better to swim with the sharks than to float with the bait!

2.    Well shipmates, hold on to your white hats, because deployments about to get longer.

3.    The female Ops Boss makes a hornet seem cuddly doesn’t she?

4.    He looks like two yards of fatback ribs stuffed into a crackerjack uniform.

5.    Are you Tony Hawk? Because you're a pro-skater.

6.    I’d rather work for an asshole that knows his shit than a nice idiot.

7.    Delegating responsibility to you is like giving 151 primer to a drunk Seaman!

8.    Are you sure this is going to work, because I’m about to perform an unnatural sex act with the Chain of Command to get that part!

9.    You outta know, One awe shit kills a thousand atta boys.

10.  If you’re gonna hoot with the owls at night you’d better be ready to sore with the eagles in the morning.

When it comes to the wimmins …

1.      While manning the rails with several sexy mommas on the pier … “Someone take my place, I think my periscope is going up!

2.    Caught in the fanroom by the MAAs’ with a female shipmate  … “There’s a fleeter on my peter, whack it off!”

3.    A new female sailor checks onboard at the Quarterdeck, and she’s smok’n hot … “Man, I’d love to swab that poopdeck” or “I’d love to drop anchor in her port.”

4.    A female officer who obviously has her priorities up the Skipper’s ass … “I hear she’s bucking for Rear Admiral.”

5.    A female XO doing personnel inspection … “I’d love to check her GiG Line.”

6.    Popeye’s favorite when asked by a split-tale what they can do for you … “Well Blow Me Down … Please!!!”

Just remember that as a slick ol’ Salty Sailor … Mature thinking has never been a problem for me