Monday, September 1, 2014

'The Nastygansett Nasties'

Another from the Preacher Man!!!


You guys got that ARR-52 tweaked and the MAD adjusted? Good... Gather 'round, spark 'em up, and listen good 'cause this ain't no shit...or maybe it is LOL!!!


One day at NAS Brunswick (a Friday) there wasn't anything to do! So about 1500 or so the chief cut us loose for the afternoon and a few of us went over to the acey deucey club!! Holy moly, the place was almost deserted!!!


We were drinkin' barley pops, eatin' bar snacks and watching some fool movie on the tube when we decided to have a good ol’ fart’n contest! Points for volume… stink… and length!! Finally it came down to me and my best bud Tommy!!!


Well now, it was Tommy's turn and after a big long suck of his Nastygansett (that's what we called Narragansett beer), he raised one butt cheek, then said quickly…


"Owyn, you win! C'mon in the head and I'll pay you!!"


WTF… why not pay me right there? But I followed him in an' he said…


"You win 'cause I just shit myself. Here's the keys to my apartment in town. Get over there fast, get me skivvies and dungaree trousers, an' under the sink is a box of plastic bags. Be quick as you can. I'll be in a stall!"


So off I went, got the stuff, and got back with everythin' in a paper bag so I wouldn't embarrass the poor feller! Tommy like I say was my best bud in the squadron and I never breathed a word while I was in that outfit… But take it from Preacher now boys, there are better things to bet on!! See now… I told you it was a no shitter and it wasn't, didn't I?!? Now let's get this shop lookin' good before it's knockoff time… okay?!? Okay!!!



  1. That is a TRUE act of a SHIPMATE!

  2. A shipmate doesnt shit in another shipmates boot.

  3. Shipmates, after I finally went on the beach I went to a flea market and found a comedy tape called "The Crepitation Contest" which was a drawn-out sketch of a professional fart contest that ended much the same way. I howled with laughter remembering that Friday at the club! And yeah, you're right, when a mate's in trouble ya just gotta stand by him any way you can. - "Preacher"

  4. There was an old 78-rpm record - you do remember records? And vacuum tubes? Well, this one was called 'The English Contest' - googling it - I find that was the 'Crepitation Contest' I believe the contestant had to grab ahold of the 'Farting Pole' to produce the desired effect. One of the 'Grand Slams' was a 'Triple Flutter-Blast!' The next challenger who tried to best that grabbed the 'Farting Pole' grimaced, grunted, built up a head of steam or some such maneuver - then shit his pants!